Saturday, August 1, 2009

Winter? What Winter?

The formatting in this post is pretty crappy - it probably reflects the fact that I'm feeling a bit under the weather at the moment - my apologies!



View from the back porch at sunset

We are
now supposed to be in the depths of Winter. The mornings and evenings can be a little cold, but the days are absolutely astounding - warm and sunny with hardly any wind at all. They feel more like a late Spring day than a Winter one. The night skies are a testament to the beauty and majesty of nature (Think I've used enough cliches there?!) Last weekend I finally managed to get some poo and compost into my no-dig veggie garden, but have no photos at present. It's about half full at the moment and needs quite a bit more before it's ready to plant in, come September.


So much has happened since my last post. A very dear friend came and stayed for a weekend or two and we camped in Wadbilliga National Park at the river crossing. It was freezing at night and it actually snowed a couple of days later and the Brown Mountain had to be closed! It was so much fun though - it had been literally years since I've been camping.


We also attended the Simon and Garfunkel concert in Sydney - what a night! It was stunning - a joy to the ears - there were times when I just had to close my eyes because I didn't want anything to distract from the music. At other times it was hard not to cry with the joy of it all. I was a bit skeptical before I went as I wasn't sure whether their voices would have deteriorated with age but it was absolute bliss! I count myself very fortunate to have experienced both.



I've applied for a car loan and had it approved and am hoping I can obtain a used Grand Vitara in good condition, but have been told this might be difficult as there aren't many around that have been traded in because they are such good cars. My other alternative is a brand new Jimny, but the verdict is still out on that one. Either way, my choice will be something that allows me to get right away from civilisation and camp out in the bush for serenity and peace, a chance to reconnect with the land which I am very much looking forward to.

I adore this countryside and the novelty of living here still remains, nearly a year later, however there are times when I feel incredibly isolated. To conquer this I am aiming to become more involved in my local knitting group, join one of the local choirs and also the local bushwalking group in an effort to get out and meet others.

A soul sister recently sent me information about Shematrix, which also calls, as I really do feel I've lost a little of the connection I used to have with the spiritual and would relish the opportunity for a little assistance in gaining it back. Isn't it awful how we let the mundanity of living overtake the sheer, utter joy of it all? It is still there - but at the present time it's smouldering embers as opposed to a fully raging fire. I've decided I want the fire and passion back! Bring it on

Saturday, May 23, 2009

The Need for Less Speed

The view from my backyard - when the fog closes in.

Again, it's been a while since I've found the time to post. Unfortunately life has been incredibly hectic lately which has caused me to reflect on the reasons why I moved to the Bega Valley in the first place.

I had a visit from my most beautiful Man a about a fortnight ago. (Can it really be that long?) While we are no longer officially seeing each other, we are in touch most days and continue to share much. I was more than happy to do the 'friends with benefits' thing although really that just highlights for me how much we should be together. For the present time, however, I shall spend time with him in any capacity I can.

He, too, reveled in the beauty of this part of the country. I left him here on his own for the weekend to enjoy the peace and quiet while YG and I went up to Sydney to visit my mother and sister and to celebrate my Mum's birthday. I love her so much and SO wish they'd both move down here too! If I had my Man, my mother and my sister here life would be complete. Anywaaaaaaaay, since he went back to Sydney I've been eating my guts out and the exercise has gone by the wayside so this is the morning I start back. I'd lost nearly 10 Kg but have put on 3 and a bit so it's time to get serious. We're going to see Simon and Garfunkel in Sydney on 21 June so I'd love to look a bit sleeker for that.

Work has been the usual - very pleasurable with stressful pockets here and there. I continue to gaze in wonder and awe at the beauty that surrounds me. The past week has seen me heading from one end of the Shire to the other on business in amongst the beauty of the bush and the sea, lakes, rain, sun and fog. My job continues to inspire me as I meet so many people with such amazing life stories, yet still things hum along at such a speed it makes my head spin and that's without me having to stand on my head!

Study has been a whole different ball game! I'm an Open Universities Australia student doing my degree through RMIT and had organised someone to supervise my exam on 2nd June WEEKS ago and submitted the details through the right channels, only to find last Thursday that my exam supervisor had pulled the plug without telling me. I only found out when the Admin lady from RMIT emailed me to say that I had 24 hours to find a new one. Talk about stress! Fortunately the Admin lady understood the bind I'd been placed in and said if I needed it I could have extra time to find someone which was wonderful. I rang the local TAFE and the exam supervisor there gave me the name of another woman who has agreed to come and supervise me in my own home - YAY! I submitted those details and they've been approved so it look as though everything will work out fine.

image by Marigold Nguyen
(It may be the hippy in me showing, but isn't Marigold such a beautiful name?!

I got home the same afternoon to discover that my FEE-HELP has been suspended for the coming study period because I'm "just" under the 50% pass rate. (Moving and YG's diabetes as well as acting in higher positions really interferes with study, you know!) So I now have the option of applying for special consideration to have my FEE-HELP re-credited which may not happen in time for next study period, paying $740 up front for my subject (which I could probably do but it would be a push and a big hassle) or deferring my studies for a study period while I sit my upcoming exam and passing so that my FEE-HELP is no longer an issue. Talk about confusing trying to get your head around it all!

I was really distressed however upon reflection I think it's actually better to take a break for a study period and re-group. Work is really busy, I've been asked to take on a Case Management Diploma on top of everything else (this is good - very interesting!) and I still have two websites to complete, hence the title of this blog episode. I ended up with a migraine that lasted nearly a week as a result of so much happening at once and had to take two days off work this week. My blood pressure was pretty high (normally it's low) and I felt absolutely dreadful with a pounding head and so many floaties in my vision it felt like someone had thrown a veil over my head - obviously a message to slow down that I hadn't been heeding!


I've been trying to practice chakra clearing before I fall a
sleep at night and think I may have to do it while sitting up. Whenever I start while lying in bed I hardly get through the base chakra before I fall asleep.

I missed celebrating/observing Samhain. Last year I carved a pumpkin and had it sitting outside my front door with a candle inside to ward off negativity and set a place at my table to honour loved ones who have passed over. This year nothing . It's raining at the moment but I've gathered the materials to make a barrier edge no dig garden and am hoping by this time next year to have my own pumpkin to carve!

Now, however is the time to give consideration to celebrating Yule. That's the weekend of both my sister's birthday and the Simon and Garfunkel concert though, so I think the celebration may need to be one of communing with those I love. One of my very dearest friends on earth will also be in Sydney that weekend so it will be full of love and warmth. I'll give a bit more thought to how I can make it a bit more ritualistic and celebrate it in my own way once we return. I have the Monday off work to travel back so that might be a good night to do something.

Having raved on enough, I think it may be time for the gym! Healthy mind, healthy body - I think it works the other way around as well. Ciao!




Sunday, March 29, 2009

Reflections

A "Bees Ruby", otherwise known as "Pinks". Image from
While I had some trouble recording the water meditation as I've never used this laptop for recording before, I *did* manage to record a Mabon meditation instead. It was about recognizing and giving thanks for those things that are good in our lives, and looking to see the positives in those parts that we might consider not so good.

I was grateful for it as my long time love and I have split and while I respect his decision and for the most part am fine, there are ti
mes when out of nowhere a gaping hole appears in my heart which seems as though it's never going to close over. We're still in touch, in some ways more so than ever, but he's so far away and I miss him so much - I can't foresee us ever losing contact, but to know that he no longer treasures an image of a shared future makes me so sad. Mabon gave me the chance to look at this from a positive point of view and to recognise that while we are no longer lovers, we are still incredibly good friends. We've shared everything in life except for birth together and we still care very much for each other. He is on a different path at this point in time, as am I, and our split leaves me free to pursue my interests unhindered and the possibilities are endless. Who knows what might happen in the future? While I'm not holding out for it, I do secretly hope that one day we might be together once more. That's how I feel when I'm in a positive frame of mind anyway, dear blog. Other times are a different matter, but I'm human so try and be a bit gentle on myself.

Apart from the state of my (now non-existent) love life, I was also able to give thanks for my magnificent daughter, my incredibly loving and supportive family, the fact that I am living in one of the most beautiful places in my country, one of the most fulfilling jobs I have ever held and the fact that I can now turn my attention to
acquiring a bit of land I can call my own and an appropriate vehicle to go with it. I was able to reflect on how lucky we are compared to others and give thought to how I might like to celebrate Mabon next year and have decided to hold the equivalent of a thanksgiving dinner and have mine and my daughters' friends over for a huge feast to let them know how much they are appreciated and how much joy they bring to our lives.

The mornings continue to have that delicious coolness in the air and the nights are sometimes the same as
well. I wake to the sound of magpies warbling and close my windows at night to the sound of kookaburras and cockatoos. In spite of the fact that the first frost is probably not too far away, I've been gardening and loving every minute of it. I've planted some Wild Iris along the driveway which seem to be thriving, a Bees' Ruby (Armeria alliacea × maritima), some lemon grass, broccoli and some red bunching onions in the little garden at the bottom of the back stairs, and two Dawson River Weepers (Callistemon or bottle brush) at the bottom of the back garden. They all seem to be thriving, except for the bottle brush which were a bit heat affected before I planted them, however I'm keeping an eye on them and hoping they come good. I also planted out a fig, although I'm not sure that it's still alive! It's lost all it's leaves but the roots looked okay, so I figure no harm in trying!

I have basil and strawberries growing on my back step, along with some lettuce seedlings that have just come through which I plan to keep in the pot on my back verandah through Winter so that the frost doesn't get them, and am contemplating planting beans and snow peas along the side fence, although need to do some more research to see if a mild frost would kill them off first. All in all I feel as though my green thumb is starting to develop! It would be really nice at the Mabon feast next year to be able to have everything but the meat either produced from my own garden or bought at the Farmer's Markets. The thought excites me no end!

Anyway dear blog, I needed to touch base and rec
ord some thoughts. While some may not consider them witchy-related, my beliefs are so entwined with my approach to everyday life that I really cannot separate the two, so there you go, sometimes things will be more esoteric, sometimes more mundane. Today I need to finish some knitting for some swap partners on Ravelry, get stuck in to an assignment that's due this coming Friday, drop Young Goddess in town for a day trip she's embarking on and tend to the garden and dinner. If I get some spare time (ha!) I might also do some work on a couple of websites I'm working on, one of which is a paid proposition - even my foundling small business is starting to prosper!

For all of this and more, I am grateful.


Sunday, March 15, 2009

Catching Up

Wow it's been a while! I knew that the festive season had gotten in the way along with a whole heap of other stuff and I've been *meaning* to get back to expressing myself, but didn't realise how the time had flown.

Okay blog, I'm sorry for the months of neglect and will try and keep in touch more often now. I gave up following "A Witch Alone" around the time I stopped writing to you and haven't done much but follow the seasons and the waxing and waning of the moon since then.

I've just come back from a week's visit to Sydney and I must say the transition from one place to another is something I'm having great difficulty with. The same with YG. We were both really depressed for the first couple of days in the big smoke and couldn't work out why - then it hit us - the noise, the people, the "busyness" of everything. The same happened when we returned home to our beautiful peaceful shire - I find I'm still winding down from having revved up to Sydney's pace of life and it's stressful!

I've been trying for some time now to get back into meditation without a whole heap of success but while visiting a girlfriend in Sydney, she returned a book I'd lent her quite some time ago. It's called "Trancing the Witch's Wheel" by Yasmine Galenorn and is a really handy book covering the elements, Sabbats and a few deities and miscellanous topics. I've decided that even though I really love "A Witch Alone", it's a little too prescriptive for my liking and so have decided to return to my old eclectic ways and practise in the way that speaks to me best at the time.

So dear blog, as soon as I've finished updating you (and listening to some exquisite music a very dear friend sent me as I type), I'll be recording a Water meditation which is associated with Autumn and listening to it tonight on my ipod before retiring.